WHAT IF???

1. what if i am not a girl instead i'm a boy?what will i look like? what kind of girl will i be interested in?what kind of boy will i be? will i be a sissy boy? will i be a tough boy? will i be a boy who always breaks girls' hearts or will i be the boy who always be the broken hearted one???what if...
2. what if i am born to the family which has everything? i mean a family which does not have any money problem at all. money is not a matter in the house. honestly speaking, money is like a tissue in the house. will i be the type of person who doesn't like shopping?because, people with money, always be the kind of people who don't appreciate life.. not all..but some of them..will i be like PARIS HILTON??hahhaha.. wonder2..will i be able to know the importance of money in this life like i do know now???i don't know..
3. what if i am the only child in my family?will i be happy like i do now? will i be lonely? will i miss the presences of sisterhood and brotherhood? will i be wanting younger sisters or brothers from my parents??? (humm..i don't want more brothers or sisters in my family now because i beileve the family that i have now is already an ideal family)..
4. what if i am not a bright type of person? what if my highest education will just be SPM or lesser than that, maybe PMR? where will i be now? what will i do at the moment i write this entry??emm..i wonder will i be a married girl if i do not further my study after completing my PMR or SPM?aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhh..i don't know what will i become if i am not here...i really mean it.. i have no skills or specialties that will make me quite a functional person..luckily i have the opportunity to come here..i'm grateful..really am..
5. what if i am a beautiful, smart, polished, gorgeous, ravishing, angelic character but a sexy girl??hahhahaha.. i now.. this "what if" will be a wild dream for every living girl in this world...but it is just a "what if"..hahhaha.. what if i am that kind of girl? will i still be interested in the same guy(S) i am now?hahhaha..note the "S"..will i be the type of person i am right now or will i be even more bitchier than now??humm..will i have lotsa frens??will i have lotsa admirers? hhahahha.. i guess, iw ill never fin out about this one..after all i cannot change the way i am now. but still i am grateful for it.. at least i have an operative brains, workable two hands and two feets..
6. what if i am not a malaysians, maybe some other citizenships???australian??american??tongan?? hahhahaha??fijian??? i don't know..u name it..i will be it..because, it it just a "what if".. hahhahaha.. humm.. wonder what will i look like?what will i be speaking out from my mouth? what will i be eating???oolart???eeeeeee..... geli.. geli..eeee.. what will i be wearing right now? leaves? maybe a bit posh, emm...tiger's skin.hahhahaha..
7. what if i am born maybe thousand years before this moment? humm..what will i be doing right now???i always imagine myself being the kungfu girl in one of the dynasties in china..even more "over" i will be the woman emperor at the time and i will be the one who give orders and commands regarding the military aspect of the nation.hahhahahha..xboley lekeh.. i know that..i know it all along..tp ini kn "what if " je.. my friend, fat once asked me what will i be in the movie "Three Kingdoms", i told her, i want to be the little girl who i know will be a great commander in the future, which is Emperor Ming..and i asked her, what will she be, she said, she will be the kampung girl but the most beautiful kampung girl in the entire village and the hero will definitely marries her once he sees her face.hhahahahha..

humm. i guess i will stop at this 7 "what if"s..hahhaha..lots more to come..but this is the most "what if"s i think when i have my free time..hahhahahha...=)

FED UP!!!

humm..the title itself has already sent a clear message of what i've been feeling lately.. i've had enuff of this long, repeated and boring talk about this person..that person.. i'm sooooooooooooooooooooo tired of it.. so f**k out..i am here not to listen to ur life story let alone ur whatever story.. i'm soooooooooooo soooooooooooo fed up with all that things..i'm okay as long it's not too much.. u have taken all the spaces inside me and has made me listen to all the craps that you feel like i am interested to know about..or maybe you must have felt that i will die if i do not know what the craps are...ok, FYI, i don't give a f***ing damn about those craps.. satisfied?????eeeeeeeeeeeee....gram betol aku...saiko!!!saiko!!!saiko!!!

i have had enuff problems, so don't you come and put some more burden on my shoulders..i don't know how long i can take it..i really don't.. i have come to the point that i cannot tolerate those unnecessary things anymore..so go away..!!!!i have my own things to look at..

ok, i would like to end this blog, with a calm heart..wish me luck!!!i'm not that angry but maybe the words are bit harsher..but i couldn't help it..sorry..

what is the problem????

humm.he told me the other day that he had to go to some place to do some ground work..so i told him, "Ok" as long as he will always be with me..so he said "ok, i will try my best but i can't promise you to be by ur side 24/7 as i don't know whether or not the place will have good reception. so i told him, "ok, i understand"...

but clearly now, i don't understand because, i sent him a couple of messages and in my sent items folders, it is stated near all the messages "SENT"..humm. i don't understand about this..ok, my positive mind tells me to believe that mybe even at the place where there is no reception, i can always sent messages and the messages will magically arrived at his phone, he can read them but the bad thing is he cannot even reply one of the messages even if he badly wants to reply it..humm..poor thing.. ok, my negative mind tells me that i have to ignore him as well as he, himself has no efforts or whatsoever in replying my messages. go to hell with the reception, if i can send him messages, he too can send me messages. right?am i right??

ok, the second thing that i really don't understand about this situation now is that, i tried to call him a few times and surprisingly, i got to hear ringing tones from his phone and shockingly, not even once he picked up the phone..humm..aihhhhh..my positive mind keeps telling me that maybe, he is busy with his ground work and he doesn't even have the slight amount of time to pick up my call. maybe, he keeps his mobile phone away from him n when i call him, he is not with the phone, so he couldn't pick up the phone..humm i sincerely hope that what i am forced to believe is true..humm, my negative mind tells me that he doesn't want to talk to you, so you should not disturb him with ur call and go find ur own life..he doesn't want to hear ur voice n he has silenced his phone so that he cannot hear it when it's ringing. he doesn't want to talk to u and he pretends to be busy or maybe he lies to you about the place has no reception at all..(humm, i wonder how i can get through to his phne but he doesn't get through with mine. am i being the one who is at the isolated place????)..oo GOd, i hate this....

ok, now, that i have poured all the dilemma in this post??so, now, what is the problem anyway????i don't know..anyone??

LEave Me Alone (i'm LonelY)..huhuhu

humm. i had a wish that i wanted to feel how it feels like when i am alone. now, the wish has come true and i really don't like how i feel at the moment..but i know, it surely will go away..but along the time that i have to be alone with myself, humm..definitely i will go senseless and demented over that period of time..hahahhaha..lucikly, i always have friends who will always be there beside me and cheer me up..hahahhahaa.. (hopefully)..finger crossed..humm..

recently, i have nothing to tell. nothing special. nothing interesting. nothing seems to interest me and the list goes on..hhahahha..n the list will have nothing..penin2..

bubbye..sya mhu mkan n main game..buhsan..

it's HIS birthday..

happy birthday to u..
happy birthday to u
happy birthday to my sayang..happy birthday to u..

hum, today is my sayang's birthday..emm sadly, i do not have the chance to post all the thingsthat i want to give him earlier..yer la..semalam bru nk sbuk beli kad kn..tp sya mmg ikhlas pun nk bg bnda2 tu..cuma terlewat skit..hehhehe..my friends said that i'm kedekoottt..yerla..habis beratus kt diri sendiri but i did not buy anything to him..humm..bukanla begitu, tp i did not know what should i buy for him..n when i asked him what he would like to have on his birthday, he said he wants to meet me..tp yg tu xleh la kn..itu lma lg la...hahhaha..so left unresolved.mmg xtau..so ini jela yg mampu disediakan ..emm tp bla nk g post plak kn..aihhh..busy betol hdup artis ni..hahhahahaha...